Nick sent me this script, a suggestion for the police dog sequence featuring Randy the randy librarian:

Randy: “So, I hear you’re a wild animal, always on the hunt!”

Officer Friendly: “Well, I…”

Randy: “Have you been disciplined? Taught to come to heel?”

Officer Friendly: “No, I…”

Randy: “I’ll give you five free personalised lessons at my obedience
school!”

Officer Friendly: “You misunderstand…”

Tamara (rolling up her sleeves, preparing an aikido stance): “I’ll
give you a personalised lesson right here, right now!”

(Randy runs away in terror)

Officer Friendly: “Hey, he understands you pretty well!